Tuesday, February 22, 2011

A Poem which attempts to dissuade you from bringing your Earthworm to the Polling Station

Some hopefully timely advice

A Poem which attempts to dissuade you from bringing your Earthworm to the Polling Station


Don’t bring your Earthworm to the Polling Station

T’would only lead to great frustration

A wriggly struggle for emancipation

Won’t result in democratic rights


For your slithery, slimy, humus decomposer

Would tick none of the boxes, the malaproposer

He’d say the erection was rigged, a muddy eyed dozer

Your lazy old hermaphrodite


He wouldn’t research manifestos of parties

Wouldn’t check independents on their work or their smarties

He’d sit back, and complain, mock with all of his hearties

All his politics kept super light


For everyone knows he’ll just moan, and I quote

“Sure they’re all only parrots, singing lines they’ve off rote,

I’m gonna go in there now, and spoil everyone’s vote”

No Polling Station for your Earthworm today


Possibly not one for the book!


Dave King said...

So fab' that almost you persuade me to take mine to the vote, just to see the outcome!

Louise said...

I want to be an Earthworm!

Totalfeckineejit said...

Ouch!Mind that worm doesn't turn! Clever, thought provoking (and provocative)and that's what poetry should be.We all need`our roots to be prodded and dug around in order to grow.Excellent work corky cushions.

Peter Goulding said...

Is a rigged erection kind of like a fake orgasm?
Seriously, some sound advice here for all worm mentors.

Domestic Oub said...

Glad I'm not the only perv who spotted the erection...

Niamh B said...

Do Dave!! Let us know how it goes.
Socks - earthworm jim was the real hero.
Tks TFE, Corky Cushions!? sounds uncomfortable...
Tks Peter - yes very close.
Oub - "the erection was rigged" was my little attempt at a malapropism, should have put an ass-to-risk beside it to explain.
Why are all my malapropisms turning out a bit grubby though?

The Dead Acorn said...

The slimy Earthworm: it’s meant just for fishin’
Though the phrase often tends to evoke politicians
(I should really be careful with comparative terms -
It’s not my intention to insult the worms.)

Best of luck in the elections tomorrow. Oh, that voters would research manifestos of parties and check independents on their work or their smarties. Ah well.

Niamh B said...

As always Acorn, an excellent additional and balancing type of verse I think.
Today's the day!

Kat Mortensen said...

Now, was that a Freudian slip in verse two?

You're the only poet I know who can play with a variety of worms and have it work. Well done!


Kat Mortensen said...

I should read other comments before I jump in, shouldn't I.

Titus said...

Brilliant, brilliant, brilliant. No! One for the book for sure!

Niamh B said...

Hah Kat, I always do that too!! :-)

Titus - think of the children!! I just can't see us making it into every major bookstore with a picture of an excited earthworm for coloring in, and how could you draw the picture without including it? Maybe it would be included in the limited edition adult's version?!... nah