Thursday, November 11, 2010

Chasing the dark

The reason for the darker mornings during winter is because there are less and less birds around to chase the darkness away with their morning chorus. The birds who have decided to stick with the job find it harder and harder to get rid of the dark when there are fewer of them around to dispel it, therefore it takes longer. The problem is that migratory (otherwise known as quitter meany-pants) birds have moved off to warmer climes, leaving the locals to handle the job on their own. They leave at a certain stage of the year when they feel the dark has put on too much weight, and won't be as easily lifted. Of course this entices the darkness to arrive early as well, knowing it'll get a good lie in, it senses the fact that there are less feathery fiends around to scare it off the next day.

THE SOLUTION:

I propose that we start building cages NOW for next year, in an effort to keep the migratory (quitter meany-pants) birds in their places. They'll get used to staying around after awhile - and if they can be convinced to keep up the singing - then we can say goodbye to winter forever...

It's just a thought

7 comments:

About Mags Treanor said...

Would it not be easier to cage daylight and not let it get dark?

The Bug said...

I love this concept! I think it's highly plausible. We've tried doing our part by having bird feeders around, but you're right, that's just not enough.

Kat Mortensen said...

Does it have to be cages though? Can we not put them in free-range stadiums or something until they acclimatize?
Have you seen, "Winged Migration"? The most bizarre piece of wildlife footage I've seen is the Canada Geese stopping over by a dusty red roadside in Utah or New Mexico or somewhere. They're hanging out beside a junked out old jalopy and you would think they must be saying to themselves, "how the hell did we get here?" Perhaps if we showed the quitter meany pants birds that footage of the pitfalls of migration, they might reconsider.

Kat

Peter Goulding said...

You're going to laugh at this but for years I thought the darker mornings in winter were due to the earth rotating on its axis away from the sun in the northern hemisphere.

Niamh B said...

Mags,the dark falls all over it, diluting the light, I fear a cage wouldn't keep it out. Now if we had a few hundred thousand cardboard boxes...
Bug - fair play for trying.
Kat - I love the thought of a stadium full of them - and you're right, a harrowing documentary projected on the big screen would work wonders.
Peter, that made me lol!! Imagine! earth rotating, indeed. Next you'll be thinking we're not at the centre of the universe

Totalfeckineejit said...

I thought it was because I haven't paid the ESB bill for 6 months.

Niamh B said...

No TFE, but that's why there's nothing on the microwave anymore