Tuesday, January 25, 2011

A Poem which attempts to dissuade you from bringing your Coyote to Claire's Accessories

Thanks all for the comments on yesterday's illustration, I will bring you some more in time, in the mean time, Yes I'm in Cork, but we also have animals and we also have shops here too, so I find my duty to research and inform on these matters is yet to find an end...

A Poem which attempts to dissuade you from bringing your Coyote to Claire's Accessories

Don't bring your Coyote to Claire's Accessories
She'd be sure to make a mess, yes sirree
I mean, I'll even have to confess; her fleas
wouldn't hop in, no matter the sweet perfume smelt
.
Illuminous tights don't look good on your canine
Neither quirky tiaras, nor fruit lipsticks shine
She prefers subdued neutrallish tones, not carmine
Her fashions are more bloody, heart felt
.
She'll think there's a road runner lurking 'mong the boas
It'll get ugly, for there's no shelter there, no stoas
and you won't hardly hear for the howls and holloas
when sparkly mascara spills on her pelt
.
Tell her stick to her den, your darling coyote
And let her do without earrings, or beads for her goatee
For a ravenous hunter, this shop's not so dotey
No Claire's Accessories for your Coyote today

9 comments:

120 Socks said...

Ah such a pity, Coyote Claire has such a nice ring to it!!!

Totalfeckineejit said...

beads for her goatee. Now there's an image.Another top class dissuader pome.

The Dead Acorn said...

No danger on this one, my coyote (Old Wile E.)
Prefers to go shopping covertly and slyly.
His sole source of gadgets (just ask him – he’ll back me)
Is a rocket and roller skate store known as ACME.

"Holloa" ... now I know the word for that menacing sound my dog is always making at me.

And 3 toes up for the illustrations!

Niamh B said...

you could see her there alright couldn't you?

Holloa's a good un, isn't it? Thanks for the toes of confidence D.A.

Words A Day said...

This is one of my favorites - for its images of sparkles on pelt and beaded goatees. Love it. Is she more of a Next woman then this coyote...or Doris Fashions?!

Niamh B said...

tks Niamh! Don't know about Doris Fashions, but Next should be safe enough.

Titus said...

Oh, so lovely. Verse 2 stole my heart.

the watercats said...

As the owner of a ten year old girl who has just embarked on the 'standing bleary eyed for several hours whilst trying to decide which particular accesory to buy' in Clair's.. This poem was particularly apt! I have to go there on saturday and be pushed and shoved by the masses of tweens.. do they delibererately make those places too small for grown ups? and coyotes?..

Niamh B said...

Thanks Titus :-)

And Watercats, I am that 10 yr old, internally at least. Think the store layout is designed so things will stick to you as you shop - inertia selling