Wednesday, October 13, 2010

A Poem which attempts to dissuade you from bringing your laptop to the swimming pool

A common sense kinda poem, providing evidence for and removing all doubt on the theory that laptops should not be brought swimming

A Poem which attempts to dissuade you from bringing your laptop to the swimming pool
.
Don't bring your laptop to the swimming pool
I know it can cope with a modicom of drool
while you snooze writing blog posts, but don't be a fool
You'd soon be ejected by life gaurds
.
For logging on in the deeps or the shallow
you'd find your notebook as bad as a mallow
for sites, no matter how worshipped or hallowed
would be blurred by the chlorine so hard
.
Yes laptops have no place 'mong swimmers
They won't float or slide, won't sparkle or shimmer
they'll sink like a stone with their damp damaged inner
and the LCD shattered and charred
.
So put your laptop on hibernate
Don't care if your best friend says it'd be great
Put it away before swimming, today's not the date
No Swimming Pool for your laptop today

9 comments:

Elisabeth said...

Wonderful, Niamh. All that rhythm and rhyme.

I have a friend who lost her laptop to a glass of champagne. No swimming pool for her.

My friend managed to convince the insurers that a glass of water did the deed, not champagne, but with a full swimming pool of water she would never succeed.

Thanks.

NanU said...

The world owes you, Niamh, a great deal for your efforts to bring common sense to our confusing modern society that tries to mix just anything together. Lobster ice cream!

Gerry Snape said...

Niamb, I love your surreal mind! give us another!!

Titus said...

Not only are these great, I am also able to teach my children using these memorable rhymes. You're a mini World Service.

Loved,
"they'll sink like a stone with their damp damaged inner"

Louise said...

You are just mega!

Peter Goulding said...

Wise words indeed Niamh and a saline lesson to us all.

Totalfeckineejit said...

In at the deep end
bubbles
letting go
plugged in
tuned out
five words drowning
this is my turn
mine

Niamh B said...

Elisabeth - shocking!! Amazing that the insurers wouldn't have been happy to refund based on alcohol spillage - surely it must be one of the commonest ways for loss of laptops
Thanks NanU - yes sometimes the obvious must be pointed out
Thanks Gerry - there's millions over at http://poemstodissuade.blogspot.com
Titus, delighted to help out with the children's education, glad you enjoyed
Thanks 120 socks!!
A saline solution almost Peter?!
TFE - the award for loveliest comment of the day is certainly winging its way towards you. Brilliant

Kat Mortensen said...

My last laptop, I wanted to chuck out the window, but taking it to the pool would have done nicely, I see. I like the diversion from animalia.

Kat