Monday, August 23, 2010

Poetry in the wrong hands

You will surely all remember how the mania for Poetry spread earlier on in the summer see here anyone who forgets
It appears this insane craze is getting worse as poetry's black market price has gone skyward. This is the only explanation I can find for the car break in at lovely Corkagh park the other day. Corkagh Park is lovely; Rose Garden, Pet Farm (with piglets and owls), Lakes, Arboretum, Hills, Woods... so lovely I was about to blog about it, and having discovered it just last week was going to be excitedly posting about its hidden gem-ness sometime this week.

Well Corkagh park - you blew it. Instead of being known as the place of serenity and peace, you will forever be synonymous with low down dirty poetry thieves.
Yeah we went for a lovely long walk in the park, and yeah - the back window was shattered, (but still annoyingly intact in big triangles of tiny bitted brokenness in that way that only car windows do) but anyway - they took the cloth hand bag which contained several of my poems, a memory stick with some of my writings and little else. I had taken my wallet and jewellery out of the same bag just earlier that day.
Here's why I know they were definitely targetting poetry, they left my friend's jacket and handbag which had a wallet, car keys, mobile phone etc... no those material things were of no interest to my sensitive souled car burglar - once this thief got what they craved, they fled the scene in a crazed bliss of poeticalness.
I hereby offer a reward of 3 haikus to whoever can bring this criminal to justice.


Gwei Mui said...

Is there no end to the deviousness that these stealers poetry will not drop too? I do hope that you get everything back

Titus said...

Niamh, that is terrible, and I would string them up and make them listen to the complete works of Milton if I could. On loop.
However, there is a compliment in this. It was your work they targeted! It happens to Van Gogh all the time, and they keep him in Galleries. And he's quite famous, albeit in another branch of the arts.
Practical suggestion far too late - always go on a search under nearest bushes, in rubbish bins or toilets. Usually stuff is dumped.

Niamh B said...

Gwei - v little hope of that - but like I say - all they really got is a coffee stained cloth bag.
Thanks Titus, Yes - I like to think they were deranged poetry fans, in love with my work - they didn't have to break a window for it tho! I give it out for nuffin! Didn't look under bushes, a bit too frazzled at the time, and just so relieved that a few important things - ie my little notebook, wallet, a memory stick with lots of photos, a couple of favourite necklaces - were all missing from the bag when they struck. The few poems they got were already in my head! so they didn't actually take anything from me.

Totalfeckineejit said...

I was going to help, but the reward put me off.

That's a feckin awful thing to happen though, Niamh.And I'm sure the cost of replacing the back window will be horrendous.Well at least there wasn't all the other things you mentioned in the bag.

Bad cess to them anyway.

Niamh B said...

Thanks TFE
Actually, insurance to the rescue again, the window didn't cost a penny to fix, literally we didn't have to even pay and claim it back and it's already sorted... creepily efficient.
Yes, bad cess anyway, twas a rotten thing to do, hopefully the poems and other writings will make em think again!!

Kat Mortensen said...

Thank goodness you tookthe wallet and the the jewelry out of your bag
Rather than a haiku reward, I'd like to write a haiku about the incident. Give me a bit of time and I'll get back to you.
In the meantime, anyone who's reading this, hie thee over to my new blog, The Kathus, where hijinks abound on a daily basis as we get ready to move house. Today, we just had a 50 year old freezer cut to pieces and dragged from the basement. Fun wow!

p.s. - I knew TFE would run a mile when he saw that h-word!

Niamh B said...

Thanks Kat, let me know when you have the h-word ready, had seen that post about the freezer alright, mad stuff, look forward to some good wistful leaving one home and finding another type poems from your quarter!

Kat Mortensen said...

Niamh - Nothing yet; it may take a night's sleep to wring it out.
Re: the "leaving home" poem
No signs of that yet either - I'm too preoccupied with the realities at the moment to turn them into something poetic. I think once we actually sell, it will all come flooding out.

Domestic Oub said...

Goodness gracious - poor Niamh, that's awful.

Two points

1) Please don't let that put you off going back to Corkagh, Its a brill hidden gem as you say, and I've been going there for about ten years, incident free.

2) Seeing as I have been going there incident free for ten years I think we can confirm it was definately a poetry related crime. And seeing as another world famous poet (after yourself) Mr Colm Keegan lives close by to said park, obviously poetry thieves are now aware of the rich pickings to be had in the area...

Niamh B said...

These things take time Kat, let em percolate, and I'm sure they'll be well worth it.
Good point Oub - can't believe you never told me about Corkagh before now though! keeping it for yourself eh!?
Ah when will the thieves of the world stop hassling us poor world famous poets?!

the watercats said...

feck it anyway!.. mind you, I can imagine a spotty faced chav kid sat on his bedroom floor, about to tuck into a nice bag full of what he thinks will be i-pods, i-phones, cards galore and maybe some cash.. then, out he pulls the poetry usb stick. Hoping there might be something valuable on it, he sticks it into his stolen i-mac and whooooosshhh... poems.. leap off the screen and infest his tiny mind of numbness, there-fore eradicating forever more the dumb cells.
You've just saved someone's whole life you know. Reckon he'll even do a pHd somewhere down the line...

Niamh B said...

Thanks Watercats, no doubt the theif will some day thank me and return the coffee stained cloth bag with all its contents