Here's a new approach to try in order to win those pesky writing competitions where there's a fee involved - directly stolen off a guy I once heard of who used this method to win the lotto, in his own way, I think you'll find it most satisfying and cost effective.
Next time you see a writing competition that you really really want to enter:
Step 1: Go ahead and write the story/ poem whatever - to the required length - on the required subject etc etc.
Step 2: Next put the entry into a drawer and forget about it.
Step 3: Before the closing date for the competition - ensure you place the fee for entry into a clean jam jar. - No cheating - if it would have had to be a bank draft ensure you include the extra cost for that. If you like include the cost of the stamps.
Step 4: Once the winner is announced - have a read of their entry - if it's better than yours congratulate yourself on winning the cost of entry back... (because you never sent the entry in)
You now have two choices - either take the entry fee back out of the jar, and celebrate accordingly, or let it build up over the year and award yourself an arts bursary - probably the week before Christmas.
If everyone did this, we'd soon see the demise of these evil organisations taking all our money and distracting us with promises of glamour and celebrity, and we can all get on with writing what needs to be written from the heart....
(Or at least if I've convinced a few of ye not to enter I'll have better luck next time!!!)
3 comments:
I reckoon I'd get a round-the-world trip out of that scheme. Now, why didn't I think of it first.....heh, heh, heh, they'll never guess I really posted mine if I keep filling the jar up....
DQ
Competitions? As I've said somewhere or maybe in a previous lifetime 'If it's not free it not worth a fornication' Entries at 4 or 5 or 6 euros (or quid) per poem for some of these comps-it's a total joke , so why aren't I laughing? Bet they are-all the way to the bank.
DQ - howdya think I'm paying for the Hmoon?
TFE - I know it's really pretty crap, best things in life are free and all that.
Really I think I'm just bitter and twisted because I only sent two things off this year, and got my first PFO back there last week.... and the other thing was Davy Byrne... so yeah feelin like it could be a clean sweep of failure for the first half of the year. As Homer says "If you never want to fail, never try" or something along those lines. I'll have to delete this post if I do win DB tho, even if I get a runners up prize, and there's that ridiculous stomach butterfly now telling me I've a chance, eejit that I am...
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