On a train in the darkness, with sleeping people around me, ripping up through the country like a bullet. The navy sky outside with a curbing of landscape black, all rendered indistinct with reflections of the inside of the carriage. Life is like this train. All seen outside ourselves is only really seen behind the reflection of what's in here, especially during the night. When the world does turn all the way around and the light shines again, I guess we'll see it clearer. People will wake and stretch and continue on their way, remove the stripey blankets and lift the oversized hoods. I will stop pretending I am working, and actually will be working, and work for me sometimes is not really work at all. Only watching other people's work. Sometimes it's standing around for hours discussing things already discussed for hours. The standing is a new thing. Keep the energy in the room by standing. A little digression re the standing
Ok for 10 or 20 minutes, but three hours. Like.
Right so. You do know I never became an athlete.
No, I know I did a bit of personal training, still do - reluctantly, to mind myself. Yes I see the benefits. Yes it feels good, but not like in the music video.
So yeah - work continues. Even though the world is mad and sad, and people who widely admit to be bad are selected over and above the same old, because anything has to be better than the same old. Because we're just so bored and disconnected and dissatisfied, and when I say "we" I mean they, and when I say "Leonard Cohen was a genius" I mean good luck to him. He sure lived. He sure wrote. He was a gift. And thought he was god's gift to women. And men loved him too. And monks. And monkeys would have loved him if they heard his music I'm sure.
The moon is getting close tonight. Closer than ever before. This will excite the 2 year old no end. A registered, official lunatic. She loves it. She thinks she can bring it home with her like a balloon on a string. Clouds piss her off no end.
Clouds will nourish the ground though. And cycles will begin again.
Nothing lasts, not even this. Not even the man with the list opposite. Seriously holding his forehead. Being very important and sharp like a shark's last tooth. Or the unrest or discontent. Or this particular inequality at this particular time. Or 2500 children homeless in hotels for Xmas, or 200 more being welcomed in to our wet and windy country.
Now the light is beginning to show, cows are at it early. Up and at it, eating the dewy grass. They might have even been eating in the dark, even before we passed.